The Music Elitist

GlassJAw performing a new song “All Good Junkies Go to Heaven”. Preeeeeeetty sweet.

What happens when you take a watermelon, a mario-esque hammer, a bald 70’s comedian with a mustache, and the music of Metallica. You get this…
METALLAGHER!!!

Ok, now for something to love. If you’ve been living in a cave on the moon with your eyes closed and your fingers in your ears you will have never heard of Bon Iver. Last winter’s newest folk obscurist. With an album that was never meant to be anything other than, a month in a cabin away from the world where one man would let out his true feelings, it’s a pretty amazing album. If you’re really one of those people on the moon, open your eyes, take your fingers out of your ears, hop on the first shuttle back to earth, and click on this link…Bon Iver

Now, it wasn’t Bon Iver I was trying to rave about, but it’s impossible for one to understand how much you’ll like this next band if you don’t like the first.  So, for Justin “Voice of Bon Iver” Vernon’s new adventure, he’s going away from the winter, and into the volcano. Volcano Choir is very up Vernon’s alley to say the least. With lush Harmonies, and minimalist electronica beats, it’s everything you’d ever want from logic pro. So, enjoy while the lava melts the sky away. Volcano Choir

Until next time. Keep talking.

Since this is my first posting on here I’ll give you all a quick introduction so you can better understand my views on this blog.

I hate mediocre music. What is mediocre music you ask? Let me give you a better idea of what I’m talking about here.

Tom Petty. I mean does that guy do anything interesting at all, has he ever? What an ass face.

Most Hardcore/Metal/Grindcore/Screamo/Spascore/Death Metal bull shit that you Ozzfest World of Warcraft monguloids love. They’re infesting every mall in america and what do they have to say for themselves other than “WE LIKE BLACK”.

Metallica, wow, there’s the clowns of the metal market right there. After “The Black Album” they SHOULD have called it quits. Only interesting was maybe the goofy looking Cherokee dreadlock sporting bass player who insisted he should have been in Korn.

I don’t even really like The Black Album. Kinda dug that one song, “Three Leaf Clover”, but that’s cause they had the NYC Philharmonic on that shit, and the NYC Philharmonic are classically trained rocket scientists, not a bunch of money grubbing wanna be metal heads.

Fall Out Boy. All things wrong with our day and age can single-handedly be blamed on this band and every Emo/Power Pop/Pop Punk/Jonas Brothers wanna be gazillionaires out there playing that Squier bass just cause that guy with the lame hair cut who likes to put pictures of his junk on the internet so he can be famous and marry Ashlee “my backing track messed up” Simpson. Douche.

So, now you know. I would go off on Contemporary Country and most Rap, but they do a good job of making themselves look like assholes.

So, now we’ll move on.

The world’s greatest super group unveiled their balls to the wall rock opus to the world today. Them Crooked Vultures made up of Dave “I love playing drums” Grohl, Josh “My old bass player was a coke head” Homme, and John Paul “Jesus” Jones. When I saw these guys at Roseland Ballroom a few weeks ago, I had a feeling I’d never felt rush over me.  I felt like I was being shot in the face with a shotgun full of Rock Salt n Roll and loving it. Listen to the album in it’s entirety on youtube.

My new favorite brooklyn hipster band is Bear In Heaven. Listen to them and bask in all it’s wheat grass electronics.

It’s the end of the world, zombies are eating that next door neighbor who never stops blasting the Gin Blossoms at 2am, and the nuclear holocaust wiped out you’re favorite sushi place, what you gonna do?

Listen to J Tillman, and take a nap of course.
With a brand new album of music you can fall asleep too, Tillman does exactly what he’s best at. Harmonies, Harmonies, Harmonies. With a lack of drumming from the Fleet Foxes drummer you’d think on a solo album he’d do more of it. But with him hitting anything he can that’s not a a drum, he gets a sequence of beats that boast his sparse musical arrangements into epic nothingness. I like it, and there’s a great video and vibe to “Though I Have Wronged You.” So watch it here. Best Video…Ever.

That’s all for today. Expect hell tomorrow.

So in the last week and a half a band that I used to be in and a band that I have been a fan of for a long while both had equipment and/or vehicles stolen from them.

Miami hardcore band Poison the Well woke up a couple days ago to head to Chicago for the second date of their current tour, only find to find that someone had stolen their van and trailer which contained all their equipment and pretty much everything they owned.

T13C was getting some rest in Orlando last week in between recording sessions for their new record when someone broke into their van and trailer and stole about $10,000 worth of gear.

Neither of these bands have tons of dispensable cash on hand to just buy new equipment and vehicles when something like this happens. When you steal from a band you’re not only taking their possessions, you’re taking their livelihood as well. Both of these bands are incredibly hardworking and while I can’t speak for Poison the Well (having never met them), the guys in T13C are some of the nicest guys you’ll ever meet. No band deserves to be stolen from.